Then, the speaker asked us to raise our hands if we believed that playing a sport positively impacted our lives and self esteem. Everyone in the audience raised their hand. Finally, the speaker asked us to raise our hands if we coached a youth team. 

I didn't raise my hand and neither did approximately 95% of the people in the audience. For me, the speaker didn't need to say anything else because her point was well made. If I so highly valued the opportunity to play a sport as a youth, why wouldn't I want to coach as I got older? When the speaker stated all the statistics around the value of youth sport participation and explained that 90% of all youth athletics succeeded because of volunteers, I decided to start coaching that day. I was 18 at that time.

What motivates you to be a coach and what are your goals for the U9 Panthers?

I had open heart surgery when I was 3 years old. That was in the 1969 and at that time the most common recommendation after heart surgery was inactivity. In fact, I wasn't permitted to "exercise" until I was 12 years old. I remember begging my dad to let me get outside and play. On this issue, my dad was the weak link between my parents because he played football at the University of Florida and I knew he loved sports. One day, he secretly took me to the cardiologist and "convinced" the doctor that I was well enough to play a sport. The doctor was not very supportive, but he finally conceded that I could play a sport, but it had to be a team sport. I wasn't allowed to do anything that was "individual" like track, swimming or tennis. The doctor reasoned that I would stop if I needed to in a team sport, but that I wouldn't stop in an individual sport. At the time, all of my friends were playing soccer so my dad signed me up to play.

Coaching has always motivated me because on a personal level it represents the "overcoming" of a challenge (i.e. my heart surgery) and the striving to be the best I could be. So, what really motivates me as a coach is to inspire my players to be emotionally psyched up to do their best and to overcome challenges. It's such a cliche to say that as a coach you want to inspire your players - but the really great coaches know how to do this. I think coaches have different styles of generating inspiration in their players, but to be a great coach you have to inspire. That's what motivates me - how do I inspire my players to find their own unique ways to try their best.

My goal for the U9 Panthers is simple - inspire - inspire fun, creativity, cooperation, initiative, industriousness, enthusiasm, friendship, loyalty - among the players and parents.

How would your players describe you as coach?

Great question and I hope the answer is inspirational, loyal, trustworthy, intense, passionate, caring, unique and hard working.

What is you favorite coaching memory or experience?

I have so many great memories, but my top 4 are:

1) Every year I try to come up with a team slogan that unites the players around a team image. When I was coaching my U14G premiere team, our team motto was T-N-T which stood for tough and together. We were't the most technically proficient team, but we were tough, and our team stood together. We made tie-dye t-shirts that had TNT on them that the players wore to games before changing into their uniforms. At the beginning of the state cup tournament, the team manager led me and the girls over to the center of a soccer field. From the top of the goal box, our parents sprinted out wearing their own version of TNT shirts. The dads were carrying boom boxes that were playing the AC/DC song "TNT". The parents circled around the players and performed a dance to the TNT song for about 5 minutes. The dance was well choreographed and the players fluctuated between complete shock and embarrassment to total excitement that their crazy parents would dance to our team motto before our 1st state cup game to get us psyched up. We won that game 5-0 and the girls played one of the best games of the year.

2) Coaching premiere soccer taught me a lot about balancing the pressure to win and to push kids to strive to play college soccer and realizing when that pressure is too much for me as the coach and the kids as players. During one particularly hot day at practice, we were running 10x120 yard sprints. The players had to sprint 120 yards in 20 seconds and then they got 60 seconds to jog back to the start line, recover and then sprint again. The goal was for all 16 players to complete 10 sprints in the required times. The players were really struggling with the drill and I was pushing them to "dig deep." I think the players completed 5 of them and then the more "outspoken" players started to "complain" about the drill. I was relatively undeterred by their complaints, until things got a little out of hand.

One of the "ring leaders" of the team, started to chant "strike." At first, none of the other players dared to chime in with her. But, then all of a sudden their was a second voice chanting "strike, strike, strike." And, before I knew it, most of the players where chanting "strike, strike, strike" as I was insisting that they line up and run another sprint. Finally, the most dedicated, hard working, quiet player, sat down on the ground and started ponding her fists on the ground chanting "strike, strike, strike." The rest of the team sat down, looked at me, laughed and continued defiantly with their chant. I knew I was in trouble, so I called out the team captains to have a "chat." The captains walked over to me rather "sheepishly" and I simply said to them - tell your players that the last person to dairy queen doesn't get a treat and then I took off sprinting for my car. All of the players made it safely to dairy queen and we finished our practice licking ice cream and laughing about my first ever team strike.

3) This particular season, we had a guest player from England on our team. She had a cool accent and she was a great fit for our team. I was somewhat of a nervous wreck that season knowing that I was "responsible" for a player (Becky) from another country. We were playing in the US Cup against a super physical team and we experienced an eruption of injuries. Our leading goal scorer ruptured her hip flexor sprinting on a break away. Next, Becky was running across the field and she randomly bumped into another player and fractured her collar bone (taken away in an ambulance). And, finally one of our midfielders went up for an air ball and fell awkwardly on her head. When I came out to her, she was unconscious on the field for just a moment and when she woke up she said she couldn't feel her right arm.

It was probably the most scared I've ever been in my life. We called 911 and I think a whole life-time passed before the ambulance finally arrived. The paramedics assessed her and then finally transported her to the hospital. I was completely unnerved as I was walking back to the team. The players had gathered at the top of the goal box and were waiting for me to tell them if their friend was ok. At that moment, I had no idea how bad her injury was and you could see the worry all over my face. When I approached the girls, I started to tear up and said to them that soccer was just a game and that we had had enough. We didn't have any subs and everybody was emotionally rattled. I told them that I was going to forfeit the game and we were going to the hospital to see our two injured players (one with a broken collar bone and the other with a cervical injury).

As I was walking away from the girls to the refs, our team captain stopped me and with tears in her eyes she said that we were tough and together and that we had to finish this game because I had taught them to try their best no matter what. They felt that quitting was unacceptable to them and to the players that were hurt. I cried even more and told them how very proud I was of them. We ended up losing the game, but it didn't matter because in our spirits we won and I have no idea where they found the courage or strength to finish playing the game.

4) The team motto for my U10G team was "One Team. One Goal." At the beginning of the year, I presented each of the players with a key that was tied to a pink string. The key represented the idea that the secret to success in our lives resides within us. The lesson to the kids was that what we think about ourselves is more important than what other people think about us. The key was symbolic to the idea that they have the key and that only they have access to their own thoughts and beliefs. Before our games, each player would hold their own key in their hand and we would say "one team. one goal. The true spirit of success is within us."

This particular day, we had a big game in Cloquet and they have physically tough teams. My team was scared to death to play against them. I knew it was important for the girls to relax and to forget about being scared so I bought a bunch of water guns and asked the parents to help me loosen up the girls. Without the girls knowledge, the parents loaded water guns and filled over 100 balloons with water. At Cloquet field, there was a "ridge" where I liked to take the players and talk to them privately. What the players didn't know was that I had led them into a trap. About 15 minutes before our game started, the parents opened "fire" on the girls. There were water balloons flying and water guns blasting. The dad's were chasing the girls all over the field. And, the girls were running and screaming. It was quite a spectacle. When the players finally settled down and we lined up to check in with the refs, the kids were soaked, happy and absolutely jazzed to start playing. The best part was that they were no longer scared about how big and tough Cloquet was. We scored in the first 2 minutes of the game and never looked back. We won the game 3-0 and the kids played brilliantly and had so much fun. Of course, they spent the rest of the season conspiring on how to get back at their parents!

What should parents know about traveling soccer before they commit their children and families?

I honestly don't know how to answer this question. I believe youth sports has a positive impact on a child's life. Coaches contribute their time because they want to help players develop. As a coach, it is easy to define your contribution by wins and losses. But, at the end of the day, wins and loss records fade and memories and connections prevail. I'd suggest that parents ask questions of coaches to get to know them as people and to understand the coach's values.

Every player is on their own journey of self development. Some kids are playing to feel connected to a team. Others are gifted, work hard and will play at a high level. Some players are forced to participate in sports. Coaches are not equally suited for all players, or for that matter, equally suited for all parents. Some parents want a highly "competitive" coach. Others want a "fun" coach.

What's hard about youth sports is that when the kids are young, their skills are all relatively equal and the reason they play is to be with their friends. But, as players develop individually, some kids are better than their friends and want to play on a more competitive team. This is when it gets tricky on a team that has been together for a long time. Kids always want to play with their friends. But, if the "friends" and "families" want different things from a coaching experience its hard to deliver on everyone's expectations.

Thus, I think parents should be aware of the needs of their child, their own goals and find coaches/teams that meet those goals. It's hard to get a player to leave "their" team for a more "competitive" team, but I think its important that we teach the kids (and especially girls) to take risks. It's good for them to try out for a different team if they aren't satisfied with the philosophy the coach provides. At the end of the day, our greatest gift to each other is our time. Thus, players and parents should be encouraged to spend their time on a team that inspires them and makes them happy to participate in youth sports.